December 24th, 1976

Just got home from spending the night with Richard. His apartment is beautiful, and he has a gorgeous tree set up with a few packages beneath. Everything seems sad. God how he and I used to celebrate Christmas. We drink wine and smoke hash and both of us cry. I’m twenty-five years old and he’s still the only man I’ve ever loved. We take a shower together and sleep together.

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I cancel all plans for Christmas Eve to spend the night, again, with Richard. I am expected at Kathy and Richard’s, Don’s, a “quiet” night at his apartment drinking wine and watching “The Homecoming” on television. I am in love and happy again. I sit and stare at his face while he watches television. I stare at him this morning as he puts Hal’s train set together. Last night we sleep together, without sex. The wonder of just sleeping together again. Waking up and knowing he is there, warm beside me. My lover, my brother. I will always love you.