July 14th, 1981

Quiet night at home. I didn’t go to a meeting tonight. I made a big salad, watched the news on television and napped. When I woke up, I walked Sadie and got ice cream. Allan and I are both restless so we went to the movies. We saw The Creature from the Black Lagoon in 3-D. A short film, but fun. Back home, I walked Sadie again while Allan made iced tea. I spoke to Jim on the phone. Allan and I watched Mission Impossible on TV. Now he has gone to bed and I am about to. The temperature dropped today to a brisk balminess. I left the office at noon and went to my porno theater. The day was glorious– bright blue skies, frothy clouds, no humidity. I was like an obsessed creature seething with horniness. I watched the sex show and waited a while to see if any gorgeous men were going to enter the dark theater, sit next to me, and pull out a huge cock. Nothing ever happens in that theater. I left– hornier than ever after the show. I thought about going to a nearby porn shop and jacking off in a booth. Instead, I walked to Grand Central Station. The urinals there are like a chorus line of masturbation. I stood at one end, between two men in business suits, all of us jacking off. I seemed to be the center of attention. I cam quickly– shooting loads of cum into the urinal. The man next to me had on a wedding band. I walked back to the office in a wonderful state of relief. Looking up at the brilliant blue sky, I had a marvelous fantasy of raising my arms and rising up, up, flying away.