“I started going through all these levels of awareness– and I started being agonizingly self-conscious and self-critical. If I laugh, I make a weird half-hysteric animal noise in my throat and I feel humiliated and embarrassed. I feel as if I must be coming across in severely retarded vibes.

Why!

Why do I go through all these changes! 

Why do I rehearse and practice and

Think

Think

Think”