May 10th, 1971

Hello Larry, Hello kid–

At this point in time, the kid is being bounced and jolted (quite literally and spiritually through space) from Atlanta, GA., to Washington D.C. I have just finished a run of 10 days with my parents, Natalie and Emmet in their trailer home in the country up from Gulfport, Mississippi. 

I have, within the past four hours, been driven in a Chevrolet along the Gulf of Mexico by two people who love me totally. I have gotten on a plane in Mobile, Alabama with a $3.00 flight bag, a canvas shoulder bag, a Polaroid camera, and a stuffed-full Hecht Co. shopping bag with a stuffed alligator tail sticking out of the top. 

I have, also within that time, walked around the airport in Atlanta where I had just enough time to fall in love. How many times have I done that? Not quite 15 minutes ago I had one hell of a religious experience.

Now I am just about to hit into my fourth cocktail (Bloody Mary’s) and trying desperately rather feverishly to somehow articulate and thereby cope with this situation that is totally overpowering me. 

My God, O Lord God, Creator of the Universe, Almighty Jehovah, My King, and Creator:

O Lord, thou art all-powerful

O Lord, thou art full of shit

O Lord, I cannot cope with thee

O Lord, I am contained with thee 

Let me now, after that last “striking” hit of vodka and tomato juice, explain my present situation.

I wish I could somehow extend the present moment an Infinitum. I would be almost willing to die right now so that the totality of this moment would be my last recognition. 

Years from now when I am aged and alone and probably tubercular, living in a ratty rooming house– the embodiment of a dying body reflected constantly in the mirage of half-met, half-fulfilled dreams years from now somehow if I can remember this moment I am sure there will be some sort of restoration of faith. Perhaps a prolonging of life one more day.