October 31st, 1981
3 days of total rest and I feel much better. My new “assistant” seems to be a royal pain in the ass. I don’t like him— he is not quick or bright or desperate on any level. He was out the first day he was supposed to work— yet refused to work today to complete a job. I swore I wouldn’t go into the office this weekend. Yet I awoke at dawn— unable to go back to sleep— stewing about the whole thing. So I’m up and at ‘em— meeting David at 9:00 in the office.
I feel great this morning— and I’ve decided that November heralds a great change for me. This is going to be a great month. This will be the month I lose 20 pounds. I know now— deep in my soul that I want to— have to— start supporting myself by writing. One small step at a time, I must start to take action.
It’s very hard for me to maintain faith in the idea that a power is at work in my life— busy creating a happily ever after for me. Quietly, shakily— I try to believe that one day at a time.