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September 13th, 1982
For the past few days, I’ve been functioning in a completely compulsive way— or ways. I’ve been overeating to the point of bloated nausea. Prowling tearooms and bookstores— spending money I should be saving.
I’m watching this carefully. Trying to know these feelings that create this behavior. The essence of compulsion for me— in all its forms— is craving— need—
Driven by desire in a thousand different masks.
I remember from studying Buddhism: desire is the cause of suffering.