September 15th, 1978

Winter, spring and summer merge into one huge memory of cold and hot. Fall begins and the universe changes. Cool nights and sharp clean days. Life begins again for me and old joys that I had forgotten begin to surface. Old friends and new loves and rich textures to daily life.

Work satisfies me. Vic called today to ask me to work on a freelance monthly magazine with him. Not sure of it yet, but suddenly, for the first time in my life, money would be real good.

Life in the house proceeds, my longing for escape diminishes.

Peggy and Karen are driving in tonight to spend the weekend with me. We are going out “disco-ing” tomorrow night. I look forward to their visit. Wonderful company for the weekend.

John and I are still seeing each other. I hold my passions in check like wild horses. Wednesday night we went out (with Wendy and her friend Richard and Allan) and I stated (again) about how much I loved him. His attitude was, essentially, to cool it– two weeks was hardly enough time to start professing undying love. Although I’m feeling it– I know now that I have to be reserved with this man who is five years older than me and who has had many more opportunities for heartbreak. He’s wary. And he doesn’t know me well enough to know that I’m not the kind of fruitcake that Axel was– just ready to fall madly and desperately in love with any stranger who happened to be responsive in a bar.