September 21st, 1980
I spend the weekend packing. Compiling the debris of a decade into a pile large enough to fit into Lyn and Paul’s van. Everything is a count-down now. I leave for New York next Friday– permanently. Spent three days there last week and found an apartment. Wonderful building– terrific apartment. Affordable on a modest budget and right in the middle of Christopher Street. Allan joins me on Sunday and a new era beings. I am filled with different feelings. Thinking of leaving Wendy and this womb that my life has been with her, I have a fright of being now on my own. I pull my bed out from the wall today to vacuum under it– there is a collection of discarded ice cream wrappers, potato chip bags, etc. that Sadie had been hoarding. Yes Sadie and I are leaving very safe waters. Waters that are drowning me.