The deprived personality begins to seek illusory satisfaction. Deliberately, I am nearly 15 minutes late for the subway today. Knowing he would be there; knowing that after our boldness at rubbing legs yesterday, at my boldness of turning twice to bid him adieu across a crowded subway platform– today our speaking to one another was inevitable. And then? Does he sound stupid to me when he speaks? Does his face appear entirely different to me? Do I just hate him? Pop goes the bubble of enchantment surrounding me these past few days. Thud, everything hits the ground. Another mismatch.
November 29th, 1979
November 29th, 1979
November 29th, 1979
The deprived personality begins to seek illusory satisfaction. Deliberately, I am nearly 15 minutes late for the subway today. Knowing he would be there; knowing that after our boldness at rubbing legs yesterday, at my boldness of turning twice to bid him adieu across a crowded subway platform– today our speaking to one another was inevitable. And then? Does he sound stupid to me when he speaks? Does his face appear entirely different to me? Do I just hate him? Pop goes the bubble of enchantment surrounding me these past few days. Thud, everything hits the ground. Another mismatch.